Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Poo in the suburbs

Alternate titles for this blog:

24 piles in 2 blocks
-or-
Not my dog
-or-
The case of the Phantom Shitter

Which ever way you look at it. It's unnecessary.

During my past two years in condoland, I have observed a disturbing behavior that drives me crazy when I take Buster for a walk...There is dog poo all over the place.

Yet it doesn't seem to belong to anyone.

"Not my dog," seems to be a typical response. Also common is, "I always pick up after my dog."

Which leads us to the case of the Phantom Shitter. If all of us who own dogs in the suburbs either have dogs that don't poop at all or pick up after our dogs all of the time, then the only possible solution is a phantom creature who's purpose for being is to cruise through neighborhoods late at night strategically placing doggie poo shaped pieces in home owner's yards to cause grief and finger pointing among neighbors.

This creature must take special delight in visiting the gated community near my town home. As I was walking taking notice of the high volume of poo on my way home this evening, I decided to count the piles for the last two blocks leading up to my house. That's right, 24 piles of poo in 2 blocks. I never saw that kind of crap when I lived downtown...is this a suburban thing?

I propose the following:
#1 Buy one of these handy poo baggie dispenser thingys from Pet Nation so you always have bags with you

#2 If you're busy or lazy, call someone like Dr. Scoopy Poo to pick up what your pup leaves behind

It's too bad that it is not socially acceptable to rub a human's nose in poo and tell them "NO! Either pick that up or do it in your own damn yard!" That'd put a different spin things, wouldn't it?

1 comment:

Ali said...

Unbelievable! That phantom pooer sure has a lot of poo to dispense, he must have an accomplice. I don't own a dog but I do know that if your dog poos someplace other than your own property picking it up is the courteous thing to do. Huh!?